Over the years the Mockroscope has offered insight and entertainment, but mostly bullshit. This month we ask our readers to give back by describing the following unrecognised and unnamed life events.

Come up with a noun to describe secondhand toilet seat warmth.
Name the colour for when you mix all the Play-Doh together.
Come up with a verb to describe Brad Pitt’s constant snacking in Ocean 11.
Name the car horn beep that is emitted at the exact moment to the car in front when it's time to move at a green light.
If pink is light red, come up with a better name for light blue.
Name the kiss a dog gives you after it’s licked its own ass.

Come up with an adverb to describe a snort laugh.
What can we call the designed holes in jeans?
Name the shiver that's experienced upon realising a spider has been walking on you.
What’s the verb for when your socks slide down into your shoe?
Name the post-coitus tissue you use to wipe up.
What’s the verb for rotating your indoor plants towards the sun?

Lazy Eye is featured in The Cud every month. Follow him on instagram HERE.