Your Monthly Mockroscope:
2020 In Review
Lazy Eye

 


They say hindsight is 20/20. Let's take a look back over the past 12 months of Mockroscope:

 

Gemini- Next time someone asks, “How you doin’?” Reply, “As good as Instagram portrays.”

Cancer- Advertising is art for capitalists. Graffiti is art for socialists.

Leo- People in glass houses shouldn’t throw swinger parties.

Virgo- Why is squash is the only vegetable that’s a verb?

Libray- Is time travel a thing of the past or the way of the future?

Scorpio- All farts are a cis male. All burps are non-binary.

Sagittarius- Self isolate to avoid catching hypochondria.

Capricorn- Make sure your pets match your level of effort.

Aquarius- Distance yourself from stupid comments by saying, “I read somewhere...”

Pisces- Call your partner in the middle of the day and start talking dirty, give it 30 seconds and then then hang up. (Ed: should we refer to this as 'premature conversation'?)

Aries- Is Covid-19 a strain of the virus originating in 2019 or, like WD40, Nescafé Blend43 or Chanel No5 is it just the latest iteration of a marketing campaign?

Taurus- Fresh air is good, as long as it’s smells like bacon.

 

Lazy Eye is featured in The Cud every month. Follow him on instagram HERE...

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