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Your Monthly Mockroscope: |
They say hindsight is 20/20. Let's take a look back over the past 12 months of Mockroscope:
Gemini- Next time someone asks, “How you doin’?” Reply, “As good as Instagram portrays.”
Cancer- Advertising is art for capitalists. Graffiti is art for socialists.
Leo- People in glass houses shouldn’t throw swinger parties.
Virgo- Why is squash is the only vegetable that’s a verb?
Libray- Is time travel a thing of the past or the way of the future?
Scorpio- All farts are a cis male. All burps are non-binary.
Sagittarius- Self isolate to avoid catching hypochondria.
Capricorn- Make sure your pets match your level of effort.
Aquarius- Distance yourself from stupid comments by saying, “I read somewhere...”
Pisces- Call your partner in the middle of the day and start talking dirty, give it 30 seconds and then then hang up. (Ed: should we refer to this as 'premature conversation'?)
Aries- Is Covid-19 a strain of the virus originating in 2019 or, like WD40, Nescafé Blend43 or Chanel No5 is it just the latest iteration of a marketing campaign?
Taurus- Fresh air is good, as long as it’s smells like bacon.
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