Your Monthly Mockroscope

Lazy Eye

 

With the world dealing with a global pandemic, our attention is rightfully focused on safeguarding our health. This month, we help shed light on some of the lesser known parallel pandemics gripping our community in the hope you keep safe.

 

Gemini- Consumerists, be careful not to catch Affluenza. Make sure to sanitize your online spending.
Cancer- Be careful that your phone isn’t causing Pavlovian distraction. Turn off your phones notifications and turn on awareness.
Leo- Be careful what you consume on social media - there are many social influenzas making us sick.
Virgo- Ill-formation is a synonym of todays media. Use caution when consuming media. Make sure you have enough to be safe but too little to be dangerous.
Libra- Wear a mask to avoid inhaling conspiracy theories or you you could end up with a conspiratairey condition. Conspi-respiratory.
Scorpio- Listening to far left or far right rhetoric can infect your middle ear, resulting in middle-ear dumb.

 

Sagittarius- Curmudgeony behaviour doesn’t need to be a side effect of aging. Practice empathy, it’s a remedy for irritability.
Capricorn- A notable symptom of loneliness is isolation-stroke. Make sure to give your hand a rest every now and then.
Aquarius- Empathetic erosion is always a risk whenever we are constantly surrounded by ill-informed, fixed ideologies, extreme political views and introspective actions. If you are in one of these areas evacuate immediately.
Pisces- Thoroughfare paralysis occurs in those with little social awareness. If symptoms persist, get out the way.
Aries- Never judge a book by its social media appearance. Life is a spectrum of experiences, look around.
Taurus- Self righteous advertising dilutes integrity. To maintain integrity stay on cause.

 

Lazy Eye is featured in The Cud every month. Follow him on instagram HERE

 

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